Sport
16 August, 2025
Clarke spectacularly out of luck
It was near perfect conditions out at Royal Rainbow on Saturday, which brought an impressive field of golfers to the clubhouse.
Signed up and ready for action were 15 men and two ladies all hoping to take advantage of the ever-increasing coverage of green grass and shoot the lights out of the course while taking home the August monthly medal prizemoney, proudly sponsored by the Eureka Hotel.
Of course, golf does not always go to plan and there can often be cruel twist of fates.
One player who suffered more than most from the fickle finger of fate was Travis ‘Bundy Bear’ Clarke who started the day in a dramatic, but less than ideal, manner.
Teeing off on the short par-three 10th, Clarke’s tee shot cannoned hard into the tree protecting the left-hand side of the hole, then re-entered the tee box, continuing on its merry little way for another 40 metres in the opposite direction to which Clarke and the course designer had intended.
There was much enjoyment of Bundy Bear’s misfortune, none more so than from his own progeny, Oscar ‘The Flying Mullet’ Clarke.
Ironically, two hours later The Flying Mullett would also fall foul of the fickle finger of fate and hit the same tree, instantly halting his ball’s forward trajectory and causing it to careen sideways towards the cemetery.
For Bundy Bear it was a day to forget as he hit more trees than a Canadian lumberjack on a busy Monday morning.
But at least he got to reminisce about his wedding day, as one ball he hit ricocheted off a tree only to finish up in the exact spot where he married the love of his life.
Even luckier was Stephen ‘The Little Pom’ Leach, whose sliced tee shot on the 8th hit the last tree on the right-hand side.
What was looking like a bad moment became a much better moment as it deflected off the tree, straightening up nicely and allowed this jammy Englishman to take an unlikely par.
Not so lucky was Peter ‘Old Man Goso’ Gosling, who like many on this day, also hit a tree, only to never see that ball again.
This was particularly unlucky because Gosling played beautifully all day and this was his only stray moment.
The golfing gods can be cruel and it was not on the cards for this day to belong to this gentleman of Rainbow Golf Club.
Two men who were playing well were Robert ‘Slugger’ Sluggett and the lucky Little Pom.
Fresh off a bye last week, Slugger looked the goods, posting one of his best scores in a while and finishing with a very strong nett 68.
But the day would belong to the Little Pom, who recovered from a double bogey on the second hole of the day to score a very tidy 74 to finish with a nett 67 and take out the August monthly medal.
Also playing well on the day was Wayne ‘Groundskeeper’ Nitschke, who despite his protestations to the contrary played a very solid game that could have been even better had a few more putts gone in instead of lipping out.
And of course, that old pirate Rodney ‘Popeye’ McLean also put in another very solid round.
This man really is like a fine bottle of wine that just seems to keep getting better and better.
And finally, the club's newest member also showed that his handicap was only going to down.
Yep, the son of Col ‘Hammer’ Gebert, Jason ‘Ball Pein’ Gebert, played a very good round, shooting a nett 72 and winning a NTP along the way.
In the ladies it was an enthralling contest between Helen ‘MasterChef’ Fisher and Lynne ‘Nelly’ McKenzie.
In the end the cook won out but only just.
A mere one shot separated these two combatants.
This week is a stableford round, which means players won’t need to count all their shots if things start going pear-shaped.
Hope to see you there.
In one last piece of exciting news, thanks to Michelle Penrose (née Summerhayes) and the good work of Lynne McKenzie, Rainbow Golf Club has a new sponsor: Arya Pulses.
Welcome aboard.
SCORES
Men: S. Leach – 74 – 7 – 67 (1st ), R. Sluggett – 83 – 15 – 68 (2nd ), P. Gosling – 89 – 18 – 71, J. Gebert – 99 – 27 - 72, W. Nitschke – 84 – 12 – 72, R. McLean – 86 – 14 – 72, A. Martion – 87 – 13 – 74, C. Gebert – 87 – 13 – 74, H. Hollamby 99 – 25 - 74, R. Smith – 97 – 21 – 76, M. Edelsten – 86 – 10 – 76, O. Clarke – 110 – 32 – 78, D. Schilling – 112 – 34 – 78, D. Clugston – 98 – 17 - 81, T. Clarke – 104 – 26 – 78
Ladies: H. Fisher – 25 points (1st), L. McKenzie – 24 points (2nd)
Nearest the pins: 5th J. Gebert, 10th A. Martion