“I started noticing changes in Matt leading up to his breakdown,” she said. 

“It was important for him to come to terms with it himself and realise without being pushed into it.

“When he first admitted there was a problem, my response was ‘you need help and I can’t give you that help’. I would be there for him always but he had to reach out and do all that in his time.”

Mr Hurley was diagnosed with depression in 2015 after a horrific farming injury left him bound to the couch.

He and Calinda have encouraged Wimmera residents to start a potentially life-saving conversation on Thursday’s R U OK Day or Saturday’s World Suicide Prevention Day.

The couple said they had been through the tough conversations the day encourages; with each other, their children and friends.

“Just bloody talk,” Mr Hurley said. “You need to speak up. It’s the hardest thing for males to do but it should be the easiest.

“If I hadn’t spoken up I’d hate to see the path I’d have gone down. It not only affects you, but your loved ones.”

Mrs Hurley said being open about mental health was extremely important at home and in public. 

“For Matt, he now knows there’s nothing to be ashamed of,” she said.

“He doesn’t have to hide. People come up and say ‘good on you’. I think he doesn’t feel like he’s dealing with it on his own anymore.”

Mrs Hurley said the couple was already teaching their son Caleb, 10, the importance of asking for help.

“We sat Caleb down in the lead up to the beyondblue day and spoke to him,” she said. “It drills in at a young age. It’s okay to be sad and to ask for help.”

Mr Hurley said initiatives like R U OK Day helped reinforce the benefits of being open, especially for men.

“I think it’s huge, it’s breaking that stigma,” he said. 

“It’s saying it’s okay for men to talk and cry about the emotions that run through your head and body.” Healthy Minds Horsham’s Gavin Morrow said for people struggling, the first step was often the hardest.

“They may find it embarrassing or hard to talk about problems,” he said.

“People think they’re the only one in the world with this problem. Obviously there are thousands, but when you’re feeling like that, you think you’re the only one in the world.”

Mr Morrow said initiating a conversation could be hard for a person worried about someone and those in need of help. He said the conversation was often a relief for both parties.